Thursday, January 27, 2005

Things You Didn't Know Until Now

1) The Pentagon (or as I like to call it, the TerrorDome) has a spokesman named Flex Plexico.(second from bottom graf).

2) How to pack and move a hippo, courtesy of the U.S. Postal Service.

How to pack and move a hippo
You'll need:
1,000-gallon tank per hippo
1,000 gallons of water
Crane
1-pound sedative
Soothing hippo music
2 Aspirin (for you)

How to pack:
1. Fill your tank with 800 gallons of water. Start yesterday. Remember, a medium-sized hippo takes up at least 200 gallons. (Just out of curiosity, why do you have a hippo, anyway?)
2. Apply sedative. Take two Aspirin.
3. Hold it, hold it - put the hippo in the tank, first. Start with soothing hippo music, followed by a large winch and crane.
4. Now go relax in a hot bath before the forklift arrives.

WAIVER: We in no way advocate moving a hippo or any animal without the express advice and consent of your local vet or zoo keeper. If you'd like advice from a veterinarian on moving with pets click here .


1 comment:

poppycock said...

okay, okay, i happen to have a giant hippo parked in the backyard. i just couldn't make up my mind on the soothing hippo music and did you say we were going to share the sedative? ;)