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A happy monthly anniversary to us.  This year has been hard, uneven. I'm grateful you are stable and patient. It's a quiet time now, but at least there's no major drama. A calm moment in the heat of summer and being able to breathe. Still, I feel like I could do more. You deserve more, even if you don't say so. Even if you protest. I just don't want to be someone who never contributes, even though you never ever have said that was me. 

I still think about Europe. I wish it would have been better, but you are right. There was a lot more happening that would have still happened if I was perfect.