Monday, December 19, 2011

150

A brief note for my love. We're in a massive push here on the game I'm working on. Longer hours, more stress. It'll be worth it, but I might not see a lot of you and the cats. I love you so much, and I'm happy you are so understanding. We'll have some time over Christmas. Then, it's back into the fray. But for now, happy 150 months, my love.

Saturday, November 19, 2011

149

To my love, happy monthly anniversary. I know things have been hectic on my end. Work seems to keep distracting me, attacking me, frustrating me...and it seeps out of me when I come home. I don't want to bring this home, and I hope you have seeing all that I have done to keep a barrier between the office and our little home. I love you, and every time I come home I know that this is a peaceful place, just for us and our cats. Thank you for reminding me. Thank you for loving me.

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

148

To my love. I hope you have a wonderful day, my darling. Tonight, something low-key in tone and appearance. A quiet night with the cats, and you, and perhaps-sure-pizza. I know things have been crazy as of late. Work is ramping up, and it'll likely be crazy for a while now. It'll stay here. I know I've brought him frustrations and stress, but no, not again. Our home is supposed to be a haven, a tranquil spot away from the strain of outside. Tonight, we do that, being home and together. Nothing else.

Monday, September 19, 2011

147

A happy 147 months to my love. I'm sorry I'm not feeling well. Considering me going to the doctor a small monthly anniversary gift for us. Not exactly diamonds and pizza, but at least I'll find the way to end this lingering cough a little faster. I love you, even if it's been sounding like "I luff ooh" lately.

Friday, August 19, 2011

146

By the time you read this, I'll be in the home stretch of the Gamescom video game expo in Cologne. I won't be around for your monthly anniversary. Even though I'll be surrounded by thousands of adoring video game fanatics, even though I'll be wrapped in the chaos and heat and light that would overstimulate a Zen monk, I'll be lonely without you. Because of the time difference, our monthly anniversary will overlap: me getting it first, and then you with a nine-hour delay. Our anniversary will last about 41 hours or so, a first! It'll be as if we pushed the planet out of alignment and made out special day about one-third longer.

I love you, my darling. I'll be home soon. Please still love me, even if I smell like an airplane.

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

145

A happy 145 months to my wonderful wife. When I come home, it feels like a home when I hear you as I come in. I love you, and I hope I am always worthy of you.

Sunday, June 19, 2011

144

Happy Anniversary, my love. Today is our twelfth anniversary of our wedding. It's not the twelfth anniversary of bring in love, or knowing each other. Those moments appeared farther back on the timeline. I don't know why we don't celebrate those pinpoints. I think we just use the wedding anniversary as a proper social landmark, a place we can look back at and celebrate when that day comes around every year. It's a common place, just like a wedding or a birthday. It's an absolute in a world that can blur work and private times. When this day comes around, we do recognize where we were when we stood up and make our vows. It was a public version of what we already left. So, we celebrate the public declaration part, and we enjoy the private histories alone, as it should be.

Thursday, May 19, 2011

143

To my love. I'm sorry I'm not in the best of moods. I'm fighting a losing battle against a headcold and a have a half-dozen headaches from my job. Thank you for being sweet and kind, letting me grumble as I decompress from a long, sneezy day. I love you, and I hope you have a wonderful monthly anniversary.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

142

A happy monthly anniversary to my love. I hope you have a wonderful day, and I hope you know how much I love you, our cats, and our little, wonderful home. In two months, my darling, it will be 12 years.

Saturday, March 19, 2011

141

Happy anniversary to my love. I'm glad I'm almost over my cold so we can spend the day together. It's my first weekend back from Boston, and I am glad to be home again with you and the cats. The afternoon sun is coming in, and everything feels at peace. I love you.

Saturday, February 19, 2011

140

A very big scare today. I couldn't access this account today to update for our monthly anniversary. A mad scramble, lots of typing, raiding email accounts...finally, here. I know who are is far more than a monthly update, but this is one of the rituals I have that makes me feel balanced when it comes to love. Once a month, and not on Valentine's Day or on a yearly anniversary, is a far better frequency to stand up and let everyone know how much I love you. Without that, something feels off, deficient. I tell you everyday that I love you, and yet I feel like I should do it more. I tell you I love you when one of us leaves the house or when we are hanging up the phone, just so you know, if that's the last you ever see of me, you know that I love you.

And here, once a month in the bandwidth, this is my shout. I love you, my dear.

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

139

To my love, a happy 139 months of being married together in love. I'm sorry I can't be more cheerful on this day, but I'm worried about my grandmother. She fell again, and I can't escape the dread that, despite a number of close calls in her long life, she's not going to be with us much longer. I'm distracted, thinking about everything from the last time we saw her - frail, but aware; mood swings that would take her from joking to despair - to what I'll likely eulogize when the inevitable comes. I don't want this day to be about looming death, but I can't escape it. I love you so much, and holding you last night kept me from being too adrift in a wine-dark sea of morbid thoughts.