210

Happy monthly anniversary to us, my love. We're coming up on another set of holidays, and we are in the same place as I was last year: I have another job coming to an end. It's not the place where I want to be, where I want us to be, but I'm in a better place than I was last year. I have a feeling I'm going to rebound far faster than I did last year. I'm sorry this is a common thing in the world of contracting. I don't like us being endangered like this every few months, but I believe it'll work out. 

209

Happy monthly anniversary, my love. It’s been a turbulent month, but at least we are still standing. I love you, and I wish I could be stronger for you.

208

Happy monthly anniversary to my love. I'm grateful for you and our cats. I'm grateful for our home-facing stability these days. The first half of this year was grueling for me, and it's only not that the ground is firm under us that I can appreciate you being patient and kind when it seemed everything was falling apart for me. Thank you. I love you.

207

Another monthly anniversary, and things are more stable than it's been in at least year. My new contract is out of games, but it's peaceful. At least I don't share the stress when I come home. I can make a calm home again. I can sleep with you as the rain falls outside. No dread, no panic. Just us and our cats. 

Happy anniversary, my love. I think 2016 is finally behaving.

206

Happy monthly anniversary, my love.

I think we are out of danger for now. Finished one contract to a massive success and now on the verge of starting another one in a couple weeks, a role that might be no more than three months, but it'll give us breathing room. It's the light to the darkness of being out of work for seven months. I'm grateful for this, and for you. And I like to think it's a gift to us, on the day 206 months ago we were married. I think I will breathe easier tonight as we are in our bed, breathing in the heady summer night air. Together.

205

Happy monthly anniversary, my love. Life is slowly getting back to normal. I have a job, for a short while at least. We have some semblance of routine again. We depart for the wider world, and we come home to be together again, reuniting in our happy home. Thank you for believing in me while I was out in the wilds of unemployment. I love you.

204

Seventeen years, my love. I thank you for your love, kindness, and support. I hope I am always worthy of you. I hope, after all these years, I make you laugh and keep your heart warm. I love you. 

203

Happy monthly anniversary, my love. Thank you for your love and support as the search for new work goes ever on. I know it's been hard, but I strangely have a good feeling something will break my way soon. Maybe it's the time spent enveloped by the recent funeral, but I can fight these spirals I can get into a little better. Whenever I'm tempted to think of myself as cursed, I can dismiss it and fight harder to see where I am now, how lucky I am, and how the world isn't over despite being out of work. It's hard, but it is survivable. I love you. Thank you for helping me see it.

202

To my love on our monthly anniversary. I wish I could give you more today. Thank you for your love and kindness as I struggle to look for work. I hoped for good news today, but it wasn’t meant to be. Maybe something will open up for me at PAX East this weekend. I will miss being with you, but it’ll be only for a few days. I love you.

201

Happy monthly anniversary, my love. I feel like, based on nothing in particular, things will turn around soon. It's a little peaceful, with less tension or worry than in the past few weeks. Thank you for understanding and being supportive. I love you.

200

Happy monthly anniversary, my love. I wish I could give you something better today. So many setbacks in the past two weeks. I'm feeling lower than I have been in recent memory, but please don't think it's about you. And I don't want my identity to be about my job, but not having one creates a void inside, a lack of meaning for me, and I suppose a lack of funds for us. I just want to be good for you and us. Still, know that I love you.

199

To my love, a happy monthly anniversary. I know things have been stressed after leaving Bungie and looking for work. I hope to find something soon. Until then, I am grateful we have a stable home and that you enjoy having me home to tend to everything here. I ask you to have patience. I will find something and we will go on with our lives soon. We've been through worse. I love you.